1. The words you use set the stage and have the power to create the play.

2. Divorce is not a failure; it is sadness.

3. Anger clouds judgment!

4. The concept of a successful divorce is as important as the concept of a successful marriage.

5. Your happiness depends solely on you. You alone have the power to create it.

6. The primary goal is to put together the best post-divorce family you can.

7. You cannot stuff your pain and win; nor can you allow it to spill all over everyone uncontrollably and expect empathy.

8. Keep your children out of the middle.

9. Anger is rooted in fear, pain, and sense of loss that arise out of unmet needs.

10. Don't "should" on yourself!

11. Respectful communication with your spouse is a priority. It is part of taking care of you.

12. It often takes a tremendous amount of courage to shed the past and embrace the future.

13. It is important for both spouses to realize the fears each has are common, reasonable, and mutual.

14. No other factors feed fear more than miscommunication, lack of communication, and ugly communication.